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6. Why I Send Snail Mail

Posted on February 13, 2019July 24, 2019 by caritagardiner
campus mailboxes

I don't know anybody who doesn't love getting real mail. When I lived with my parents, I would sort through the pile of bills and catalogues that came through the front door's slot every day to see if an envelope had my name on it. While I rarely received anything, I never lost the kind of "infinite hope" that Nick Carraway admires in himself and in his pal Jay.

When I was at summer camp, travel programs, and later college, my parents would send me at least one letter every week. Like any privileged kid, I took their ability to take time and the expense of sending a letter, as well as the functioning mail system of our country for granted. On the other hand, I always appreciated getting the cards. Honestly, it didn't matter to me what those notes said as much as I loved knowing that they spent the time of writing focused on me. People, even if they were my parents, were thinking about me.

Seven years ago, one of my beloved colleagues decided to leave the school where I still work. His new job meant the departure also of his wife and baby daughter, who would ward to me if they both stopped living. I didn't want her to forget me because if the worst happened, she'd have enough horror to deal with without being scared of her new guardian.

To keep my name on her mind, I started making a point of writing her a letter every Friday. When her brother came along, I included him in the missives. As soon as they learned to draw/write, the mom helped them to reply. I don't know if they've gotten to the point of rolling their eyes when they hear that Auntie Carita has written to them, but I do know that once a week, they know that I took time for them. When we see each other in person, which is sometimes as infrequently as once per year, they know and remember me; we don't have to start over each time.

We have so many ways in life to show other people that we care about them. Writing a letter seems to me to be a pretty great opportunity to reach out, across time and space, to say, I'm thinking about you. I care about you. You matter.

If you want to post a comment, maybe you could start it with, "Dear Carita..."

by Carita Gardiner

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WHAT I DO

I teach English to high schoolers at a boarding school in Connecticut. I read AP English Literature and Composition exams and serve as a teacher mentor for the University of Pennsylvania Teaching Fellows program. I’ve earned a Bachelor of Arts (Amherst College), an Education Master in Learning and Teaching (Harvard University Graduate School of Education), a Master of Arts in English (Bread Loaf School of English), and most recently a Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing with a certificate in the online teaching of writing (Southern New Hampshire University).

As a writer, I hope to capture the complexity and joy of life in the New England boarding school world. On this site, I share what I know about trying to write fiction while teaching English, coaching, and doing the other tasks associated with helping to raise over six hundred other people’s children.

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  • cgardine@hotchkiss.org

Read my recent “Why” Wednesday Blog Posts

  • 257. Why Take Advantage
  • NetGalley Review of Ready or Not
  • NetGalley Review of The Prospects
  • 256. Why Be the Sag Wagon
  • 255. Why Broken
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