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386. Why Shuffle-Ball-Change

Posted on May 20, 2026May 19, 2026 by caritagardiner
Screenshot 2025-12-18 at 7.56.38 AM

In the airport in Miami, I saw a woman in the attire above. I asked to take a photo of her pants and shoes because I needed evidence of my pink and sparkly sole sister. I couldn't find the shoes online, so I don't own them...yet, but give me time. If you, dear reader, find them in your random internet searches, 9.5. 'Nuff said.

The image above might not be as random as it seems, given the title of today's post, but I do have to backtrack a little to work my way to why everyone should be wearing pink, sparkly shoes at all times. And the story begins, as many do, with a Peloton Outdoor run workout I completed recently. I'm not 100% sure, but I think it was a Jess King ten-minute, cool-down walk. (Note, I don't get anything from doing this, but if you want to try Peloton for sixty days free, you can click this link. If you sign up, do this 12/10/2025 walk to see if you hear anything from today's post.) At the halfway point, instead of saying the usual, "It's time to turn around and go home," the instructor told me to "shuffle-ball-change" back to my starting point. In my head, I went right back to my fifth-grade, after-school, tap lessons. And I also thought about the importance of both the pivot and the jazz hands.

I am not one of those people who thinks it's ever too late to do the right thing. Here, I want to talk about my daughters for a minute. My older daughter was, from ages twelve to twenty-four, absolutely set on becoming a doctor. She did ALL the things she was supposed to do to make that happen:

  • completed all pre-med college requirements
  • earned EMT certification
  • trained in flebotomy
  • certified in BSL-3 lab protocols
  • studied COVID comorbidities in Mt. Sinai Hospital
  • researched for and was published in an ophthalmology study on glaucoma

Then, around the time she started to study for the MCAT, she realized that she didn't enjoy medicine and didn't want to pursue this career path. She knew that it was time to pivot, and she found a job at a wealth management firm, where she's much happier and has already been promoted.

My younger daughter has taken advantage of several opportunities to change paths. She started college in a highly selective liberal arts school in a rural, New England town. After a year of getting great grades, she knew that she wasn't a fan of three things: small schools, cold/dark winters, and small towns. After doing some research, she decided to head to San Diego, where opportunites abound and she could figure out her next steps. She got an entry-level job at a grocery store and, by being her wonderful, responsible, attentive self, has earned promotion after promotion and a scholarship into a management program at a nearby community college.

I'm so proud of both of them. To be clear, neither these wonderful young women nor I believe they are doing the job they will do for the next fifty years. I'm proud of them for embracing the journey, the quest, the pivot. On their paths through life, both have shown themselves to have a lot of great characteristics:

  • fortitude, to accomplish anything they put their minds to
  • resilience, to bounce back from setbacks
  • intelligence, to learn new skills
  • resourcefulness, to find employment in a tricky economy
  • positivity, to know that today's circumstances aren't permanent

Both girls haven't stuck it out in situations they don't love; instead, they've stayed open-minded and nimble and aware. Both are contemplating what's next and learning from what's now. Rather than merely follow the road ahead, they've been moving with style. I like to think that instead of the mere pivot, they have perfected the shuffle-ball-change, a move that not only changes the weight from one foot to the other, but does so with the equivalent pizzazz of a pink, sparkly sneaker and jazz hands.

I love that both know that following the path in front of them even if it's not making them happy isn't going to give them the lives they want. They know that not making a choice to change is making a choice to continue with the status quo. What great lessons!

Please share your responses in the comments.

 

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WHAT I DO

I serve as a class dean and teach English to high schoolers at a boarding school in Connecticut. I’ve earned a Bachelor of Arts (Amherst College), an Education Master in Learning and Teaching (Harvard University Graduate School of Education), a Master of Arts in English (Bread Loaf School of English), and most recently a Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing with a certificate in the online teaching of writing (Southern New Hampshire University).

As a writer, I hope to capture the complexity and joy of life in the New England boarding school world. On this site, I share what I know about trying to write fiction while deaning, teaching English, coaching, and doing the other tasks associated with helping to raise over six hundred other people’s children.

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Read my recent “Why” Wednesday Blog Posts

  • 386. Why Shuffle-Ball-Change
  • NetGalley Review of Dolly All
  • NetGalley Review of The Cherry Blossom Boathouse
  • 385. Why I Love Instagram
  • NetGalley Review of Good Joy, Bad Joy
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